Men with funny hats

On my way back to Madagascar at the end of February I once again had the typical ~7-9 hour layover in jolly old England. Typically I don't really make plans beyond leaving the airport and heading to Picadilly but this time around I was determined to make it in time to catch the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace. My flight landed at 920AM and I knew the funny hat men started to sing and dance at 1130AM so it was going to be close.

I rushed off the plane, cleared customs surprisingly quickly, hit the luggage pickup and grabbed my bag and hockey sticks (since you still can't check bags through to your destination... thanks South African Airways), dropped them off with the sketchy Eastern European fellow at the baggage storage place, and hopped on the Heathrow Express. Long sentence - short series of tasks. My gross, post overnight, unshowered scruffy self made it to Paddington station for the transfer to the tube to Picadilly Circus at 10:40. I knew if I hurried I might make it.

The tube or underground or whatever you want to call it is very unique... For the Edmontonians think of the LRT but older, noisier, far more packed, and with significantly more unidentifiable oh-dear-lord-what-is-that type stains everywhere. Yah. It's safe to say that the person whose idea it was to use plush, squishy, plaid material on the tube seats wasn't really thinking long term, or hygienically. Eww.

A short journey on the tetanus express brought me to Picadilly Circus at 11:15. Fat man run mode engage! I jogged up the steps and out of the station onto Regent Street. It was then I realized in my thin sweater that perhaps the 0 degree C day with a light mist and cold breeze wasn't ideal changing of the guard weather, but it was too late to quit now. A six block jog down Regent towards St. James park, a quick right onto "The Mall" - the road running parallel to St. James on it's North side - and a few deep breaths later and I'd arrived to catch the funny hat parade just marching onto the Mall.

Funny hats, Eastern Europeans, and pooping horses. SO EXCITING!

As a kid I remember bits and pieces of the time we managed to see what I think was the changing of the guard at Buckingham (and by bits and pieces I mean funny furry hats). Today I was to learn that what they call "the changing of the guard" is British for "battle of the marching bands - funny hat edition and also horse poop".

All fecal joking aside, the music and the pageantry is pretty cool. The music is especially fantastic. I am a fan of all things instrumental, classical, etc and it was really very neat to march halfway down The Mall next to these folks as they played some fancy music. Apart from the gypsy that tried to pick pocket me (here's looking at you Julian) I was impressed by the sound they managed to produce in the 0 degree weather all while looking absolutely ridiculous.

This is the first band that I encountered halfway to Buckingham on the mall. They shall henceforth be referred to as Franklin and the Furry Hat Men.  They come marching down Marlborough road from what I presume is St.James palace (though I am making most of this up) and then turn right and head West towards Buckingham.

The best part about these bands is the marching band leads the way and then shortly behind is a group of furry hat men with automatic weapons to presumably force anyone caught not enjoying the awesome to enjoy themselves. I can't help but wonder if this is the same tactic they deploy at Celine Dion concerts.

Following Franklin and the Furry Hat Men towards Buckingham Palace

Look at all of the fellow tourist folks. Dedicated bunch - it was damn cold.

As you round the bend the group of police officers on horses politely prevent you from taking the easiest route to the show and just following the band down the street. After pushing various families, small children, unsuspecting old people, puppies, and other defenseless human beings out of the way I made my way through the crowd and across the street to the Palace.

Last shot of Franklin and the Furry Horse Butts.

As I stood and slowly froze to death I watched Franklin and the Furry Hat Men proceed through the square into the front courtyard of the Palace. At this point they emphasized their awesomeness by playing one last tune, angrily stomping a bunch of times, and then had one fellow yell angrily to presumably signal the end of the show.

Thinking of leaving as my ADD was kicking in and I was starting to get bored I heard another band playing their way in from the South side of St. James park. I would upload the video I took of the challenger band "The Furtles" sounding off their battle challenge but the Blogger platform is garbage and when I attempt to upload says "an error has occurred" so alas, you will have to imagine the awesome.

Look at the  stern look on this officer's face as he guards the entrance of the The Furtles. Serious business.

And so the stage was set for a badass brass clash like no other, excluding the last few hundred years worth of the same thing. The Furtles stomped and played their way into the courtyard, finally marching to a stop to face Franklin and his assembled battle group.

Both sides stood firm, the very picture of moderate seriousness with a hint of disdain for the cold weather. The tension built as the battle groups exchanged seriously stern looks, loud yells, and more very, very stern looks. But, just as Franklin and his ragtag gaggle of partially frozen fur encrusted brass players were about to unleash their sixth volley of really quite stern looks The Furtles took to their instruments and began the first of many volleys in an epic brass battle that can only be described as average.

The battle raged for what seemed like at least two or three minutes. Both sides alternating pauses to look seriously at the other as they played their little furry hats off. When finally, against all odds - the victor was decided. Not by the crowd, nor any sort of totally awesome clap registering machine like at those cheesy band battles on TV, nor by Ryan Seacrest, but by the queen's own cavalry. That's right - the cavalry. These Brits take their music shows seriously, I mean look at Simon Cowell.

It's judging time.

Anyway, the cavalry stormed into the square (not really, it was more of a slow trot) in funny red dresses carrying judgement swords, spreading horse manure, and dispensing battle judgement. Franklin and the Furry Hat Men had defeated the Furtles and earned the greatest honor of all -  the right to stand in front of the Palace for a while in funny outfits while noisy tourists photographed them.

Following their disgraceful defeat The Furtles were escorted off the grounds by the red dressed horse folk who even in defeat showed honor in saluting the victors by playing their way out. Another video I could show if you Blogger didn't suck.

Anyway, that brings me to the end of the battle of the bands. The losers are presumably escorted back to the barracks where they are executed for failing to uphold the honour of the Queen... or maybe they just try again later, I'm no expert.

Following the show I headed back to Picadilly to grab a bite to eat, hopped back on the train and that was my six hours in London.

Until next time here is a picture of a very confused pelican and a moderately amused duck.

His head is on backwards.

Quack.

Clear skies over Greenland

This is the fourth time i've tried to post this since I got back. Sorry all - the internet here is LAME. Anyway, I will update with an other post tomorrow or Sunday. AAAAAAAAAAAARGH and now the formatting is broken because the blogger platform is HORRIBLE. I am only slightly TOTALLY UPSET. Oh well - the next post won't be broken but I refuse to spend anymore time trying to fix this bullshit interface. Sorry it's so painful to read. Blame Google.

So I've broken my solemn oath to update the blog more often for the upteenth time. But hey, what better way to make up for that then by putting together a post? 

I spent the last two weeks at home on my second rotation. It was absolutely wonderful to be home and spend time with Lisa, the dogs, the family, and friends. Negative highlights include the molar root canal, catching some type of horrendous throat / lung / sinus / icky infection, and gaining 15 pounds. Spending more than half of your fourteen days at home hacking, coughing, snotting, and otherwise being disgusting is not ideal, but home is home!

I write to you now from my wonderfully hipsterish iPad enjoying a terrible movie about a teacher-turned-MMA-fighter just over halfway between Edmonton and jolly old London. The only thing that makes this movie watchable is that it distracts from the terrible turbulence we had earlier.

Now a little background - I am one of those types that given a window seat never, ever closes it. Do you like sleeping through sunrise on night flights? NOT IF YOU'RE SEATED BY ME! :) You see, I like being able to occasionally catch a glimpse of neat stuff and have been rewarded in the past by things as neat as seeing other planes, catching fireworks displays on two occasions, seeing an engine on our plane flame out (don't ever want to see that again), catching beautiful night and day time scenery, scoping out our ice race tracks on my way in and out of the city, among other wonders.

All of those neat things aside tonight's brief view has been a special treat. Whilst watching the most excellent movie I mentioned earlier and trying to catch up on some work email I peeked out the window and was blown away. It's not very often that you get a totally clear glimpse of the ground from 36,000 feet and even more rare does that happen at night off the Western coast of Greenland. Using the wonders of modern technology (my horrible iPhone camera) along with some suitably horrendous apple approved software I present for your review the following spotty (and horribly digitally enhanced) night shots of the Southwestern coast of Greenland taken from my seat.

A view of Edmonton at take off

Grainy awesome 

More grainy awesome

I promise it was actually pretty.

You have to believe me!

This is roughly where I was. Apparently that's the capital of Greenland. According to Wikipedia they have the highest rate of suicide per capita out of any other country. How cheery!

It's unfortunate that the shots are so poor but take my word for it that the sight was breathtaking. A crystal clear view of stark white Greenland with what I only assume were two fairly sizable cities shining brightly against the bleakness. Had I internet access I could use the awesome that is google maps and figure out just what those cities are buut alas Air Canada hasn't figured out inflight internet yet. :(

Anyway, I thought you might enjoy a glimpse into my inflight boredom. Maybe it's time to catch some shut eye. I've got some Londoning to do tomorrow before catching my economy (ugh) flight to Johannesburg.

Daytime snap of the Western UK

Planes are neat.

That's all for now!